You are one of those people
Who are happy to drive
So you have an excuse not to drink

You are one of those people
Who have your group of friends
And the membership costs them a hell of a lot

One of those people who bite things in two
Even crisps
One of those people who baby their cats
[unintelligible sounds]

I am one of those people
Who avoid those people
One of whom is you

You are one of those people
Who select the salad
And then the Cornish pasty at the station

You are one of those people
Who go to Berlin
Just to have been there and to tag yourself

One of those people who take their time
Putting their purse away
Even though there's a sizeable queue
So walk away from the counter

You are one of those people
Who do not care
That I don't like those people

One of those voices like Myleene Klass
One of those voters with no idea
And I am one of those people
Who must ascertain which people are those people

You are one of those people
Who don't watch TV, supposedly
But you must because you're Charlotte not Miranda

You are one of those people
Who live to complain
Because you love it when you're the star of your own life

One of those people who never change
Happy as you are
One of those people who can't be alone
You need to be surrounded

And you are one of those people
Who'll never know that you are one of those people

You are one of those people
Who do not know that there are types of people